Monday Morning Is Here Again

Its one of those days! Because of being laid up for all of last week I now feel like there is so much catch up to do around here. I took my shower and while washing my hair I decided that I indeed would spend the morning cleaning the upstairs. I hurried through my morning ritual and ran downstairs to get another cup of coffee.

Oh that's right! I cant clean the upstairs today. I need to pick the cherries and harvest the stuff that is ready in the garden. This I have to do. I have no options. I was only able to pick just few squash this past week. The funny thing was that when I last picked things the week before I looked everything over with a critical eye and decided that I would give the beans one more day and the cherries really were ready but one more day of heat would do them good too. Well the one more day turned into a week, so you see I really have to do that garden today!

So with that in mind I head to the bedroom to get my shoes on. Oh yeah, I need to load the washer. I only half loaded it last night. I walk into Tinks room to get her laundry then I remember. Today I was going to go through Tinks shirts and throw out the ones that were too small. I've been doing this all summer as I purchase new ones. Yesterday I bought her two more new shirts so two old shirts have to go!

Of course, I cant toss two shirts without taking new inventory of her clothes. I cannot tell you how hard it is to keep that girl looking neat and put together. I know I've decried this on my blog before but really people, how is it that some people's children always look put together and I have to struggle to keep mine from looking like hooligans? Take just now for instance, Peter is walking around here in red shorts and a sky blue shirt! It just assaults the senses!

But back to what I was saying; I cant do the clothes now because I have already decided to take care of the garden today. And since it's the first cool day in a week I really should rake the leaves from under the apple trees. The "June drop" is natures way of culling out the weaker apples and shedding leaves not needed. Its always a messy time in the orchard. Actually orchards are messy any time save the dead of winter!

It's 57 degrees outdoors and the kids are determined to swim in the pool. I guess I should just let them and then they can decide on their own whether its too cold or not! I'm tired of trying to restrain them!

Well I really do have to go take care of that garden! I have three kids here beside my own that I am babysitting. I'm putting all five kids on the cherry picking detail. Tonight is the first night of VBS. I'm suppose to help with the story telling.

Okay, I really have to get off of this thing and get something done. The whole half acre awaits me!

I met my past on the sidewalk

"I like your skirt! That outfit really looks nice on you!"

What a strange lady I thought to myself. "Thank you," I said aloud.

We stood on the sidewalk facing each other. She called me by name but I couldn't figure out who she was. She pulled the pony tail holder out of her red hair and gave her head a toss. The move was familiar. Then I knew! "Hi E", I said, "How have you been?"

The years unrolled between us. I was carried back to another time, another place.

I was 18 years old and in love with a 24 year old man. My parents were against it. The elders in the church were against it. Jay had a background - a bad one. He had spent most of the time between 14 years old and 24 years old in and out of jail. I met him in one of his good times.

He convinced me I was in love with him. Being young and never having truly dated or been in love, I believed him. We dated for several months before we decided to get engaged. Again the older ones around me warned me that this was not a good thing. But Jay told me he had changed and I so wanted to believe it. He told me that if I married him he would never get in trouble again because all he needed was a good wife at his side.

I had my doubts but love was such a beautiful thing. He gave me my first kiss and I thought I had died and gone to heaven. Truly this was love. But the check in my spirit would not go away. My dad was putting a lot of pressure on me to break it off with Jay. I cried and pled with my dad to let me continue dating. He didn't know that we were secretly engaged. Nobody did. It was just between us; another thing that bound us together.

It was a tumultuous year. Earlier I had put in an application for Voluntary Service at a children's home in Ohio. One day there was my acceptance in the mail. My parents were thrilled. Now I would go to Ohio and be far away from Jay here in Oregon. I said goodbye to my parents. I said good bye to Jay. I went to Ohio and began my work there.

I had only been there about 4 weeks before word came that Jay was married! I was shocked! We had been engaged! He hadn't even been dating anyone else! Who had he married? Yes, you guessed it. He had married E. They had eloped and everybody was as shocked as I was. They barely knew each other!

E was a girl who had burst on the scene just a year or so before this. She had a little boy about a year old. She and I became friends in a funny sort of way. She introduced me to all sorts of herbs and tinctures. We used to drive into the inner city and frequent dark little herbal shops that smelled of strange things with little Chinese ladies as proprietors. It was a strange world I knew nothing about. She took me to her house once and I was amazed to see all the drying herbs that were hanging from the low rafters. Cats twirled around my legs as I toured her strange little cottage.

Eventually E joined our church and became well known for her eccentric ways. She was tall, very tall, and she had lots of fuzzy red hair over which she perched wild hats with large plumes. She used to let her baby walk all over the church building while the preaching was going on.

Then when her son reached the pulpit she would sedately arise from her pew, cross her hands in the air in front of her and with the feather from her hat keeping rythm she would walk all the way to the front of the church and fetch her son. She put bells on the shoestrings of the baby boy so there was always a lot of tinkling and commotion while her son prowled the church.

She was a strange lady but I liked her in an odd sort of way. I shared with her what I was going through with Jay. She used to pump me for information about my dates and such. Now here I was in Ohio and she had eloped with my boyfriend!

I eventually came home and J and E eventually had a baby girl together. The church they attended was holding Conference meetings so I, still unmarried and unattached, attended the meeting with my parents and siblings.

There I saw J and E. After church E swept past me in that stately way of hers and whispered as she passed, "He's mine now."

I just stood there incredulous!

Behind her came Jay holding the baby with dark curls. "Just think," he whispered, "this baby could have been ours." And out he went after his plumed wife. I stood there stunned! Now reader you may or may not believe this but that is exactly how it happened.

Years went by and they had two more children. I still was not seriously dating anyone. Not long after the third baby word came that E and J had divorced! I was not surprised. In later years E told me that it was my fault because Jay never got over loving me.

I began dating Mr Darling eight years after J and E had married and divorced. I had only been dating Mr Darling for 4 months when one night there was a knock on my door. I opened it to find Jay standing there! I hadn't seen him for several years. I was shocked. "May I come in," he asked?

I said he could and thus began a long night wherein he begged me to come back to him. I told him I was dating a man I loved and that I didn't want him anymore. While we were arguing about this the phone rang and it was Mr Darling. Jay insisted on talking to him.

This was the conversation I heard from Jays end. "Yes, she says she loves you but I have loved her longer than you have and I know her far better than you ever will."

"Okay, lets do that."

Jay turned to me and told me that I was to get on the other line. So I did. Then Jay says, "Miss Darling, we have decided to let you choose right here and now. Who do you love the most and who do you want to be with?"

I was dumbfounded! "Honey," I said into the phone are you there?

"Yes," he answered. My heart skipped a beat. Just hearing his voice was all I needed. "I choose Mr Darling, Jay. Now could you please leave?"

"Well, Mr darling," Jay said, "She chooses you. All I can say is you had better not hurt her. If I ever hear of you hurting her you will have me to deal with!"

This was laughable. He had hurt me by the ultimate betrayal. Mr Darling would never do anything like that.

Jay left and I called Mr Darling and the two of us talked long into the night.

Three years later Mr. Darling and I were married.

Through the years I saw E a few times at funerals and weddings. After all, our friends in the youth group were mutual friends of ours. They too had grown up and we all attended a lot of the same events. Sometimes even Jay was at the event. We were an odd triangle. Mr Darling never went with me to these things. They were part of my life as a Mennonite and he didn't know the people so I was always there alone.

At each event E would make sure to tell me how often she still saw Jay. It was also at these events that she would pull me aside and tell me that Jay always loved me but I could be so glad I never married him. Then she would tell me stuff that only a wife would know. It was all to let me know that she knew him in ways I never would.

I didn't care! I hated this whole triangle that existed.

Twenty years passed. It was a hot afternoon. I had just finished picking berries and now I was walking into the store to get some pectin for the jam.

"I like your skirt. That outfit really looks nice on you." I turned to see who was talking to me. She leaned forward scrutinizing me. She had gained weight but so had I. I stared at her as I slowly searched the face before me for the woman I use to know. There was no hat with flying plume, no stately walk, - just an aging lady leaning on her cart. With one sweep she pulled the pony tail holder out of her hair and the fuzzy red masses fell around her shoulders. It was a feeble attempt to recapture her youth.

We exchanged hellos. I was surprised to find that she lived only four miles from me. She was jobless and trying to go back to school. She told me she had been briefly married again for three years. She then asked me if I had ever married. I cannot tell you how happy I was to tell her that yes indeed I had married and that just two days ago I had celebrated my 20th anniversary.

We chatted stiflly for a bit then I asked her,"Do you ever hear from Jay anymore?"

"Oh I talk to him all the time," she said with that laugh I remembered so well, "You can be glad you didn't marry Jay. He is just huge now! There it was again. This knowledge of Jay that I was suppose to covet. "Well I gotta go, she said abruptly, "I have frozen things here that I don't want to thaw in this heat, ya know."

As she turned to go I caught a glimpse of that stately walk that used to be hers. Just a glimpse of that girl that used to be... then she vanished and in her stead was a middle aged lady with a loud flowered skirt and flip flops, her fuzzy red hair held together once again with the elastic band, her face etched with age lines making her look far older than she was.

She was so right! I can be glad I didn't marry Jay. I stood there on the sidewalk and winged a prayer of thanks to the God in heaven who had blessed me with such a wonderful husband and family. Truly He had been looking out for me way back there thirty years before.

I couldn't help but feel sorry for the lonely lady that was loading her groceries into that old car across the parking lot. I gave her one last look and turned and walked into the store. The past was behind and I was glad to leave it there. Hopefully we will never meet again!

Back Update and Raspberries Galore

My back is about 60% better tonight than it was last night this time. I went to the chiropractor and had an ultrasound with a deep muscle massage and I'm feeling so much better. Tomorrow I have another massage treatment. I also went to my primary care physician and got more pain killers and muscle relaxants! I think I'm on my way to wellness now!

Tomorrow begins the long 4th of July weekend. We have no major plans. Of course we will do fire works and probably attend the parade like we do every year but this weekend is basically going to be focused on setting up the pool. My husband just told me tonight that he definitely does plan on getting the pavers down but he's going to set the pool up now anyway since its so hot. He will just take it down in a couple of weeks when he goes to do the pavers. I am so excited. There is almost nothing my heart has desired more than those pavers!

Another good thing is happening. A girlfriend of mine has raspberries and she said I could come in and pick all I wanted for FREE! Can you hear me screaming?!!!!! Last year I found raspberries anywhere from $2.80 a pound to $3.10 a pound. That makes a ten pound flat incredibly expensive. So now with my own blueberries and all the free raspberries I want it is really going to cut into my berry bill! I'm going to mix the raspberries with blackberries for jelly. Of course I'll freeze some raspberries just plain but nothing beats the combo in jelly!

Todays garden yield was two cucumbers and a huge zucchini that I had overlooked. I also got a yellow squash tonight. Tomorrow I am going to drizzle the squash with olive oil and throw it on my grill to roast. How yummy can we get? I'm also going to have Tink make an angel food cake and I'm going to serve it with whip cream and fresh raspberry sauce!

Now you may wonder how I'm going to pick raspberries with a bad back. Well I'm basically going to just chaperon the process. Mr Darling and the children are going to pick and I'm going to just get whatever is in front of me without stretching. I have to go out there. I just cant let this opportunity slip though my hands!

The chiropractor about had a fit when she learned that when I had a little relief from pain on Monday I went out and mowed the 1/4 acre side yard! I have to admit that's when things got real bad with my back! I didn't tell her that I also picked 2 gallon of blueberries in that little window of time! I had that pain free couple hours because I had taken the neighbors muscle relaxants and my husbands pain pills! But there was work that just had to get done.

She probably wouldn't be happy to know that I'm picking raspberries tomorrow either. Truly my back is way better after the treatment. And you know, I did promise not to bend or stoop or stretch! I'm just going to pick the few that are smack in front of me. Who can fault me for that?

I Need Your Prayers

Okay, you guys this blog isn't getting an update today. I am in great pain. Somehow my three herniated discs in my lower back have all decided to flair up at one time. I have been bed fast for two days now and have had intense pain since Saturday. Tuesday and Wednesday I wasn't able to get out of bed without shooting pain across my lower back. I spent most of yesterday sleeping because of the drugs. This morning I am going to the doctor. Id appreciate your prayers. This pain is nothing funny. I'm been taking heavy meds and nothing seems to be touching it!

The Big Reveal

Yes, you read that right. I have decided that I indeed to need a different blog for my homeschool stuff. So I started a blog just for that purpose. I laboriously hand copied the last homeschool posts from this blog into the new one. I'm only going back as far as 2008 in recopying.

In doing this I see that I only posted two or three homeschool posts a month on this blog. I was amazed considering that I live, eat and breathe curriculum, tutoring, teaching and so forth in my real life.

Well that is all over because now I have a place where I can write anything I want about home school and only those of you are truly into the home school groove will have to read it.

Just today a blogger called me from Illinois to ask about the best curriculum for her child. Yesterday a friend called me and wanted to know if she could send a lady she knew my way for curriculum advice. I love this stuff! And now I have a blog where I can write about it "till the cows come home".

So there now, 'nough said. Just go make your way over for the great revealing of my homeschool blog. It's simply called Blueberry House.